A CHANGING WORLD

This world is changing, are you changing with it? From the 1960’s to present day so much has changed and yet so much has stayed the same.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that while we are advancing technologically, we seem to be struck in our thinking about race.

America’s history is an ugly one soaked in blood and yet right-wing conservative still refuse to acknowledge that. Critical Race Theory is the new buzz phrase that has white parents, Klansmen, and morally corrupt politicians outraged. Some white parents and politicians are opposed to teaching children the truth about America’s history. Condoleezza Rice, former U.S. Secretary of State stated on national TV, “that white kids shouldn’t be made to feel bad for being white.” Citing that as one of the reasons why she is opposed to the teaching of Critical Race Theory. To that argument I ask, why have we been teaching children a distorted history of America, which made black children feel bad? Why don’t we teach children the truth which would include every race that helped to create the United States of America. Maybe then we could expose white supremacy for what it is…a racial theory that is a lie. What are the parents that are opposed to teaching the true history of America afraid of?

Black History Month is almost here so I propose this year we tell each other about obscure historical facts, not the history with which we are familiar. For example, Black officeholders during Reconstruction. Denmark Vesey, American Maroons, Free Blacks that owned slaves.

Let’s not be deceived and think that Africans did not participate in the slave trade. But let us not forget that slavery in Africa was not the peculiar institution that it was in America.

I think it would benefit all Americans if we could tell the truth about America. Simply put, the concept of America is a good one, but it was corrupted by xenophobic thinking. What would America look like if fear and hatred had not been allowed to grow and spread across these united states. America could one day be great if we could deal with things like race, equality, justice, opportunity…

FORGIVENESS

Forgiveness is a voluntary act, a choice we make. But forgiveness does not come easy, especially if the hurt came from someone you loved.

In this life people will disappoint you, some will even hurt you. The hurt that people inflict does not cut as deep as the hurt that a family member can cause. The closer the relationship correlates directly to the pain delivered. Sometimes the people we love hurt us on purpose. When that happens, it is almost impossible to understand. You ask yourself why would they do that? And, as you struggle to comprehend why, the hurt that you feel increases.

The response to the pain can be any number of responses, but usually we decide one of two things. We will try to talk it out. If an apology is offered, we will accept it. But what do you do if your family member refuses to talk it out? What do you do if that person throws you away?

When that happened to me, I went through every emotion imaginable. My response was not pretty as I sought to tell my side of the story to anyone that would listen. After the tears, anger, the character assassination and the years lost. Finally, there was nothing left to do, but sit in my pain and ask God to intervene.

God did an amazing thing. He changed my heart. Although an apology has never been offered, it was no longer required for me to forgive. I don’t know what the other person feels, I feel relieved. The burden of carrying around that hurt is gone.

LEGACY

A Legacy is passed from one generation to the next. I always thought of a legacy as something of monetary value, a house, money, car, or jewelry. It was not until I got older that I thought about the personal legacy that I will leave behind. Yes, I want to leave my son and grandkids something of monetary worth, but I also want to leave them with a personal legacy.

Having worked for over 40 years I will be able to leave a monetary legacy. But, while I was working hard, I never thought about leaving something that would not fade away, be spent, or lost? How many times have you heard that someone was left a house, money, or both, and within a year or two that person had lost everything?

I want to leave something that will not fade away or be lost. I want my story to be passed on from generation to generation. I want to leave my son a lifetime of memories. I want him to know that I lived my life as well as I knew how. I want him to be proud of the woman that I was.

As young mothers we were more concerned about providing the basic things of life for our children such as food, clothing, and shelter. As we worked, cooked, cleaned, and worried how we were going to pay our bills, we also tried to teach our kids how to be good people. But few of us taught our children to save, invest or plan for retirement. How could we teach them something that we were not taught?

My son is an adult with a family of his own and now as a living legacy we talk about wealth building, and the importance of spending time with family. We also discuss the importance of having a personal relationship with God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. We express to each other things that are on our hearts and what we hope for each other. Having an adult relationship with my son is a trip. He teaches me more than I have ever taught him. He challenges some of my point of views, but he knows that I’m unshakeable regarding my faith in God and Jesus Christ.

Although there are things that I did not teach him as a child, we are learning things together and teaching each other now. If my son and I disagree on a subject my son will quite often dispel my argument with the statement “Come on Mom that’s not how you feel, I know you.” The phrase, I know you, use to make me angry. But now I’m glad that my son knows me. It tickles me that he thinks he knows everything about me, not just surface stuff but the deep things of me. My son will not have to question who I was when I’m gone, because he knows who I am.

So, while we strive to leave our children monetary things to build wealth, let’s not forget to teach them principles to live their lives by. Exoteric as well as practical things. Let your children know who you are, what you wanted out of this life and what you accomplished. We will leave our children a personal legacy, so if you need to apologize, explain, or correct some things do it now. Do it now while you have the chance to tell your story in your own words. Let them know all of you because you are more than their mother.