Forgiveness is a voluntary act, a choice we make. But forgiveness does not come easy, especially if the hurt came from someone you loved.
In this life people will disappoint you, some will even hurt you. The hurt that people inflict does not cut as deep as the hurt that a family member can cause. The closer the relationship correlates directly to the pain delivered. Sometimes the people we love hurt us on purpose. When that happens, it is almost impossible to understand. You ask yourself why would they do that? And, as you struggle to comprehend why, the hurt that you feel increases.
The response to the pain can be any number of responses, but usually we decide one of two things. We will try to talk it out. If an apology is offered, we will accept it. But what do you do if your family member refuses to talk it out? What do you do if that person throws you away?
When that happened to me, I went through every emotion imaginable. My response was not pretty as I sought to tell my side of the story to anyone that would listen. After the tears, anger, the character assassination and the years lost. Finally, there was nothing left to do, but sit in my pain and ask God to intervene.
God did an amazing thing. He changed my heart. Although an apology has never been offered, it was no longer required for me to forgive. I don’t know what the other person feels, I feel relieved. The burden of carrying around that hurt is gone.